Jolene

// Tracklist

1. Auburn

   You’ve heard my name in whispered tones You’ve watched the legend start to grow You’ve built a story out of bones And darling, I enjoyed the show Auburn hair and emerald eyes That’s what they always talk about But there’s a woman underneath the lies And she’s the one you’ll never figure out

   I’m Jolene, and I’ve got a story to tell I’m Jolene, and I tell it so well You want the truth? I’ll give you something close The parts I want, the parts I chose So settle in and hear me out I’ll tell you what it’s all about I’m Jolene, with the auburn hair And honey, you should probably beware

   I’ve seen the way you clutch your man When I walk into the room Like I’ve got some master plan Like I’m spelling out your doom Maybe you’re right to hold him close Maybe your fear is justified I’ve learned to keep my cards held tight And let the legend be my guide

   So let me tell you who I am Or at least the version that I’ll share You came looking for a villain Pull up a chair

   I’m Jolene, and I’ve got a story to tell I’m Jolene, and I tell it so well You want the truth? I’ll give you something close The parts I want, the parts I chose So settle in and hear me out I’ll tell you what it’s all about I’m Jolene, with the auburn hair And honey, you should probably beware

2. Preacher's Daughter

   Daddy stood behind the pulpit every Sunday Preaching hellfire and the narrow way And I sat in the front pew in my good dress While the church ladies judged me where I’d pray Soon enough I started turning heads And suddenly I was the problem in the room Boys would stare and I would get the lecture Like I was the one who’d led them to their doom

   Preacher’s daughter, pretty little thing Held to standards no one else could meet Preacher’s daughter, careful how you sing Careful how you walk and talk and breathe They watched me like I was already guilty Before I even knew what falling meant Preacher’s daughter, born to be the warning Of everything a good girl shouldn’t represent

   Mama told me cover up those shoulders Don’t you smile so wide, don’t laugh so loud Don’t give them any reason to start talking Keep your eyes down low and don’t stand proud But I was just a kid who wanted sunshine Wanted to climb trees and skin my knees Instead I learned to shrink myself to nothing Learned to say I’m sorry, learned to please

   They said Eve was beautiful and look what happened Beauty is a curse that leads men on So I carried all their fears before I’d grown Before I even knew what I’d done

   Preacher’s daughter, pretty little thing Held to standards no one else could meet Preacher’s daughter, careful how you sing Careful how you walk and talk and breathe They watched me like I was already guilty Before I even knew what falling meant Preacher’s daughter, born to be the warning Of everything a good girl shouldn’t represent

3. Talk of the Town

   By the time I turned eighteen I had a reputation Built on things I’d never even done Mary’s husband looked at me one Sunday And by Monday I’m the reason that he’d run I never spoke a word to that man Never touched him, never gave a sign But his wife told everybody at the diner That I was the snake who’d crossed the line

   Talk of the town, that’s what they’d say Every husband’s weakness, every good wife’s fear I could walk into a room and watch the smiles fade away Feel the women pull their men in near Talk of the town for things I never did Just a pretty face they wished would disappear

   The rumors grew like kudzu on a fence post Climbing higher, choking out the truth Every mouth repeating what they’d heard Like I was poison, like I was proof I stopped trying to correct them after a while Stopped explaining, trying to fit in ‘Cause every time I opened up my mouth to speak They’d already decided on my sin

   Funny thing about a reputation Once it’s built there’s nothing you can do They don’t want the truth, they want the story And the story’s always better without you

   Talk of the town, that’s what they’d say Every husband’s weakness, every good wife’s fear I could walk into a room and watch the smiles fade away Feel the women pull their men in near Talk of the town for things I never did Just a pretty face they wished would disappear

4. If the Shoe Fits

   I spent years saying sorry for existing For sins I never did commit Shrinking down and staring at the floor Praying that they’d let it go ‘Til one morning I said no I was tired of the weight that wasn’t mine If they’re gonna call me something anyway Might as well make it worth my time

   If the shoe fits, I’ll wear it If you’re gonna crown me, I’ll be the queen If the shoe fits, I’ll own it Might as well be everything you’ve seen You want a villain, I’ll give you one You want dangerous, watch me walk If the shoe fits, I’ll strut in it Since you’ve been making me the talk

   I bought a red dress and some high heels Let my auburn hair fall down Walked into that store like I owned it Held my head high off the ground The whispers didn’t stop, they got louder But something shifted deep inside If I’m paying for a sin I didn’t do At least I’ll wear the sentence with some pride

   It’s not surrender, it’s survival When you can’t win, change the game If they’re gonna write you as the villain Might as well earn the name

   If the shoe fits, I’ll wear it If you’re gonna crown me, I’ll be the queen If the shoe fits, I’ll own it Might as well be everything you’ve seen You want a villain, I’ll give you one You want dangerous, watch me walk If the shoe fits, I’ll strut in it Since you’ve been making me the talk

5. Window Three

   I got a job at the bank downtown Teller window three, that’s me I used to hate the way they’d stare Now I’ve learned to let them see The men come in and lean a little closer I let my fingers graze their hand “Here’s your receipt, sugar, have a good one” And watch them try to understand

   Window three, I count the money Window three, I stamp the forms Window three, I smile slow And let them dream up all their storms I let my touch linger just a moment Let my voice drop low Window three, I’ve learned the game And I run the whole damn show

   There’s one who comes in every Thursday Wedding ring catching the light I hold his hand a beat too long Call him sweetie, watch him fight His wife sits out there in the parking lot I see her through the glass I whisper low, “same time next week?” And watch her watch him pass

   I never take what they say I take I just stopped holding back A little touch, a little smile Just enough to keep them off track

   Window three, I count the money Window three, I stamp the forms Window three, I smile slow And let them dream up all their storms I let my touch linger just a moment Let my voice drop low Window three, I’ve learned the game And I run the whole damn show

6. His Eyes

   Let me tell you about the man in question Since everybody wants to know He came to my window every Thursday And I gave him quite a show He had kind eyes and a wedding band Told me about his kids, his life And when he looked at me too long I let him forget about his wife

   His eyes might have wandered Because I let them roam His eyes might have lingered Because I made them feel at home You want to blame me for his looking? Go ahead, I’ll take the praise His eyes were his to give away And I enjoyed the gaze

   Did I flirt? Yeah, probably Did I know what I was doing? Yes I’ve been playing this game my whole life I’ve gotten good, I must confess I kept him hanging, kept him wanting Gave him just enough to dream And every Thursday he came back Hungry for another scene

   A little touch, a little wonder I never crossed that final line But I made him want to cross it And that power? That was mine

   His eyes might have wandered Because I let them roam His eyes might have lingered Because I made them feel at home You want to blame me for his looking? Go ahead, I’ll take the praise His eyes were his to give away And I enjoyed the gaze

7. What I Want

   You think you know what I’m after Well, this time you’d be right I used to want the simple things But now I want the fight The way they can’t stop looking The way she can’t compete I used to run from what I am Now I’m dancing to the beat

   What I want is to be feared What I want is in your head What I want is that look in his eyes When he’s lying in your bed I want the power that I feel The way you can’t look away What I want is what I’ve got And I’m taking more each day

   I want to be the one she thinks of Every time he’s running late I want to be the doubt that lingers The question mark, the twist of fate I want to walk into a room And feel the air go still I am the storm you’re scared of And I’m here for the kill

   You made me into something Might as well enjoy the ride I am exactly what you fear And I’ve got nothing left to hide

   What I want is to be feared What I want is in your head What I want is that look in his eyes When he’s lying in your bed I want the power that I feel The way he can’t look away What I want is what I’ve got And I’m taking more each day

8. Pardon Me?

   I saw her watching from the parking lot Just the other day She sat there with the engine on Practicing what she’d say I saw that look, I know it well The fear that’s eating her alive Poor thing doesn’t know what’s coming Doesn’t know I always thrive

   Pardon me? You really want to play? Go ahead and try it, honey I’ll ruin your whole day Pardon me? You think you’ve got the nerve? Come on then, let’s do this, darling I’ll give you what you deserve

   She’s probably lying awake at night Running movies in her head Imagining the confrontation All the things she should have said But when she finally gets here She’ll find out I don’t break I’ve been playing this game forever And I never make mistakes

   You want to blame me for your problems Go ahead and point the finger But when you’re standing right in front of me You’ll find that doubt will linger

   Pardon me? You really want to play? Go ahead and try it, honey I’ll ruin your whole day Pardon me? You think you’ve got the nerve? Come on then, let’s do this, darling I’ll give you what you deserve

9. Please

   She caught me in the parking lot at closing Her voice was shaking, asking me to stay She said “Please, Jolene, don’t take my husband” I took my time before I had my say I could have sent her on her way right then Told her there’s nothing here to fear But where’s the fun in that, I wondered Let’s see what happens if I keep her here

   Please, you cry, please Jolene Like I owe you peace of mind Please, you beg, like I’m the one to blame For a man who hasn’t been kind You want the truth? You couldn’t take it And a lie won’t set you free So I’ll just smile and keep you guessing What happened between him and me

   She asked me straight up if I’d had him If I’d ever made a move I let the silence stretch between us I didn’t have a thing to prove She started crying even harder Begging me to just be straight But I’ve been judged my whole life, honey Now it’s your turn to wait

   Maybe I did and maybe I didn’t You’ll never know for sure You came here wanting closure But I don’t owe you any more Go home and ask your husband See what he has to say Me? I’m done with this, honey You can wonder every day

   Please, you cry, please Jolene Like I owe you peace of mind Please, you beg, like I’m the one to blame For a man who hasn’t been kind You want the truth? You couldn’t take it And a lie won’t set you free So I’ll just smile and keep you guessing What happened between him and me

10. Jolene

    So now you’ve heard the whole story Or at least what I wanted you to hear Did I tell you the truth? Maybe Did I leave some parts unclear? You came looking for a victim Someone to pity, someone to save But honey, I’m not your damsel I’m the monster you made

    My name is Jolene And I am everything they said The woman in your nightmares Living rent-free in your head My name is Jolene Auburn hair and emerald eyes And yeah, maybe I took your man Or maybe those are lies

    I could tell you nothing happened That your husband’s safe at home I could give you peace and closure But I’d rather leave you alone Wondering every night forever If he thinks of me in bed The not-knowing is the torture And I’m already in his head

    To every woman who’s been painted As something she was never meant to be Some of us decided to embrace it Some of us decided to be free You made me into something dangerous So dangerous I became And now I wear the crown you gave me And I’ll never play your game

    My name is Jolene And I am everything they said The woman in your nightmares Living rent-free in your head My name is Jolene Auburn hair and emerald eyes And yeah, maybe I took your man Or maybe those are lies

    Just call me Jolene And watch me walk away Did I or didn’t I? I’ll never say Jolene, Jolene The myth is now the truth I am everything you feared And I’ve got nothing left to prove